Day of Silence

Today is 4/21/2017 and it is currently 11:21 pm.

It’s taken the whole day to formulate my thoughts and think of a way to put everything I want to say into legitimate words.

Today is the Day of Silence.

This day represents the struggle that LGBT people face from bullying and harassment, as well as the silencing effect it has on them. So, in order to illustrate that, people in my school (and many other schools) decided to participate. I was one of those people.

What I did wasn’t in any way monumental. All I did was duct tape my mouth shut and carry cards so people who question me would see and understand. However, it was powerful. I, myself, am not purely part of the LGBT community, but I am considered an “ally” to it. I have friends who are in this community and this is one way I can show to them that yes, I am here for you. One would think otherwise, but I really did feel the emotion of going through with the action of keeping my mouth sewn shut by the vows of silence.

I am not writing this post to just explain what I did or why I did it, but to show you what happened when I did it.

My school is said to be very open to all of society, but it was almost a little hard to see that today. When I walked around the halls with green duct tape carefully stuck on my mouth, I saw people stare. I don’t want to infer anything without knowing any facts, but one could say that their face illustrated, “Oh! I didn’t know she…”  or “Is she…?” The funny thing is that I’m not… (should I complete their thought?)… gay. I’m not a lesbian, nor am I bisexual/a transgender/queer, but I AM in full support of them. On an even more serious note, here is another experience I had today: As soon as I got the tape, I put it on and started to trot down the stairs, happy with my decision to participate in this collective day of silence supporting a part of society that feels oppressed. Once I got to the ground floor, I turned and started to walk the hallway, noticing a group of boys on one of the sides. As I neared them, they all stopped talking. One of the guys turned another guy around to look right at me in the eyes. He saw my mouth. What did he do?

He laughed.

I shot him the dirtiest look I could and shoved him one of the “Day of Silence” notices (I’ll set it as the featured image) people were handing out during the day. I was so angry, and as I stormed off I thought, “Is this REALLY the type of stuff that people go through? And on a daily basis?” Just that little laugh meant so much and I felt so much with it. I’m not directly affected, but now I have an idea of what it could be like: much worse than what I experienced. I’m lucky that I’m in a school where not all of the students are going to laugh in someone’s face like that, but I don’t want to forget that people do much worse. Society, in its own way, has made it hard for LGBT people to be accepted for who they are and it has affected the mindset of the youth. My and future generations have to be the ones where people are accepting others for making their own decisions and choices, not deliberately laughing at them.

Today is the Day of Silence. Whether you took a vow of silence or not doesn’t matter. It all comes down to whether or not you can accept others for WHO THEY ARE and who they choose to be.

We are all just people.

Accept the similarities. Accept the differences.

It’s now 11:59.

Tomorrow, let’s speak up for those who need help to rise above the hate.

Later or Never?

Later.

What exactly does that mean to you?

By the dictionary it means “Afterward in time” or “At some unspecified time in the future”. Really think, what does this mean to you? Maybe it has no meaning, maybe it isn’t relevant. Let me give you some perspective.

Later, to me, feels like an empty promise.

Later, to me, feels like a goal left unachieved.

Later, to me, feels like the inevitable end to an idea.

Later, to me, feels like one is postponing what will never happen.

Later, to me, means Never.

Now, it does matter how the word is formally used. Because it doesn’t always imply the crude note I’ve attached to it. For example, when someone says, “See you later!”. This doesn’t convey any harsh tones or give any saddening feelings. Compare this situation to one where someone asks for a moment of your time and you say:

“Later”.

Think about it.

What does this achieve? This blatantly and cruelly shuts someone down. Whatever that one person had hoped for is completely out of mind because you’ve taken away their importance. You’ve then taken away the importance of what they wanted to say or convey to you, and to them, you have even taken away the importance of conveying that message to you. Perhaps I’m reading too much into the word for now, but it’s true. Say you have loads of work to do but you just said “Later”. What would you be doing in between Now and Later? Would you be achieving something- learning something new? Would you be going out and finding something interesting and valuable to you? Is there any way that what you had planned to do being postponed will be beneficial to you? Ask yourself that.

As for me, I’ve been in that situation (no denial there). As a high schooler I am a victim to that, of course. In that way, I’m not the perfect student or the perfect daughter or the perfect person, but I do try my best to stay true to myself, my ideas, and the people around me, giving them importance and time. I think everyone at some level is willing to say “Later” to something that doesn’t matter as much to them. Just make sure that when you do say it, that it isn’t to the things that matter because that won’t achieve anything. Remember how often you do end up telling this word to people because if too much, then the only one you’ll be hurting is yourself.

 

-ruhikanblog

via Daily Prompt: Later

BLOG?!

My first blog post! That’s exciting, isn’t it?

I am currently writing this at 10:47 PM  on 3/16/17. I know, I know, you’re going to see the time stamp anyway, but I still feel the need to re-establish it.

This blog.

I honestly don’t know what I plan to use it for, but I know I want to use it to really speak my mind in ways that I might not be able to otherwise. I plan to take this and really make something of it, whether I’m writing on something purely fact-based, or something that deals with more emotional concepts, I intend to share what I feel about the topics. I hope that you will hear about anything and everything that comes to my mind, so I can share my views on it. I want to put my thoughts and ideas out there and learn more about not being afraid of being scrutinized and criticized by the rest of the world.

Here it is: my next move.

As a 15-year-old, I am constantly learning how I can help better myself for the future and honestly, I feel that I really strive to do that. However, instead of just helping myself be a better person, I want to help others. Now, by this, I don’t mean affect people and change them. Instead, I want to become a positive influence on others’ lives and help them become positive influences and set off some sort of chain reaction.

Everyone has their dreams. This blog is one of mine.

This first post was pretty short, but don’t worry, it is a precursor to many more lengthy and hopefully, more eloquent ones (or should I say that you SHOULD worry).

Good luck handling the rest.

 

-ruhikanblog